Thoughts on parenting for productive people


It’s 9:23 on a Friday evening. I’m sitting in bed, by the open window. It’s dark outside already, and a gentle rain is falling from the sky. Once in a while a lighting strikes and brightens up the night sky, but there’s no thunder, which makes it very cozy. I think to myself: “Man, it doesn’t get better than this, I’m so lucky to live this life.” The only thing missing would be maybe a cup of tea, but I didn’t make tea because I’m too freaking exhausted to do that. In fact, I’m probably too freaking exhausted to write this article as well. Ah, and my laptop is at 5% battery, great. I’m definitely too exhausted for this sh*t.

That escalated quickly, right? You see, there are a few elements from the scene I just described above that would have made zero sense up until a couple of months ago, at least for me. For instance, I used to write first thing in the morning, between 6 am and 8 am, because that was my most productive time of the day back then. No interruptions, no phone calls, emails… Just me, my laptop, and my ideas, typing away. I used to never work at night, only relax. But then I got a kid.

Another thing is, I used to never work in bed, I thought that was crazy. A bed is meant to relax, sleep, and have intimate time with your partner. It’s not meant to work, let alone to focus on anything. I used to think people who work in bed have unresolved issues in their life. But then I got a kid.

Another example? I used to stop work early on Friday afternoons to enjoy an early weekend, unwind, and forget about work. In fact, I used to barely work on the weekends. But then I got a kid.

That’s right, I have a kid (did you miss that?), a 9–5 job, and my business on the side, and I’m somehow supposed to keep my sh*t together, not go bonkers. I’m told it’s doable because others have done it before. I’m keeping my sanity so far, but the first collateral victim of fatherhood has been my precious, cherished routine I took so long to build. It now gets shattered to pieces every morning, and I spend each day trying to find a few hours (or minutes) to pick up the pieces and glue them back together. Needless to say, it’s not easy.

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